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I Am... Mama and Writer

First Mama.  Then Writer.  Though, of late, the latter has consumed a great deal of time as I work to get things in order to potentially be ...

Tuesday, June 30, 2015


Pressing thoughts.  The kind you cannot push away too long.  Haunting until they are released.  And so it has been for me these last few months... and longer.

To hair or not to hair.  Or, perhaps, to rephrase in a way more socially understandable: to shave, or not to shave.  Those are the questions.

And what a tumult of thought and feeling has come into my little world as a result.  And so much insight and understanding of things I never questioned before.

You see, as long as I can remember, I had some sort of aversion to hair.  Not to the point of utter and complete disgust... but darn close.  And so, at around 10 (maybe younger?!), I shaved every part of my body that I could.  My legs?  I think so... not sure if I had time for them.  My arms?  Yep, that's where I started... I think, because I could see them most.  My belly?  My chest?  Yep.  And yes.  The funniest part... I was shocked when my Mom asked me if I had shaved!  I mean, how in the HECK did she know!??  I was sure she had special "Mom powers of knowing" before that, but it was just solidified by that question.

Now, 29 years later, I see so much that I couldn't even comprehend then.

I see that I was in complete rejection of a basic and instrinsic part of myself at a very young age because I saw my Mama rejecting the same in/of herself.  If she didn't like it on herself, it must surely be unacceptable/unwantable on me!

To question why she did what she did was not a tool in my skill set at such an age.

Partially in answer to the unknowable question (why did she do it?), I now see that my Mama was conditioned by a sick culture to reject this part of her womanhood and femininity.  How very sad, right?  I mean, who wouldn't want to be a woman!?!!?  (HA!  I love it, but I know lots don't... but that's a whole other post!)

Another unknowable question back then: why would a culture condition it's women to reject a part of the process of their maturation?  Of course, I didn't ask it.  Not then.

But I sure have in the last few years!

And then, the pieces of the puzzle that is the sickness in our country and world today began to come together for me.

One huge piece of that puzzle was when my Mom shared a prophecy with me.

She did not proclaim it a prophecy.  Indeed, she would never describe the things she foresees as such.  But all of us should be prophets with the gift of prophecy, if, indeed, we have faith in Christ.  Even as Moses said, basically: I would that all in Israel were prophets.

What prophecy did she share?

She told me that it would not be a great many years before the lawmakers in our country began the process of making pedophilia "just another sexual orientation".  When did she say such a thing?  About 10 years ago... maybe it was just 8... but it was a WHILE ago, yall.

And what's happening?  True, it's been 'only' a little here and there.  But that's how it starts.  That's how the movement to make (and this is also part of her prophecy) homosexuality, bisexuality, and transgenders socially acceptable and even "popular" began.  If you don't think it's popular, you are living in a place of denial... and I have a river to sell ya.


Are you wondering how I've gone from shaving (or hairing) to pedophilia?  If you wonder, I might question your discernment.  Surely it makes perfect sense if you are using your spiritual eyes.
Just in case I have any among those who have made it this far who do not see, but desire to:

We are the frog in the pot.  In MANY ways.  Humans, I mean.  But especially those of us here in this blessed (at least it once was and could be again if we would turn with one accord to our Father in Heaven and serve only Him) land called The United States of America... or whatever version you desire to reference it.  Those of us who are supposed to be benefited by The Constitution of said....

We are a frog in a pot.

The heat is sin.

The fire is temptation by the devil.

The water temp rises as a greater and greater number of people in this Nation choose sin (and making evil good and good evil).  And we begin to cook, sitting still, thinking we are comfy... without even knowing it because the temptations were so small in the beginning.  Until we are frozen in the state before death when our muscles are paralyzed because they are already cooked, but our brain is still alive...  thankfully, we are not an actual frog and we can remove the heat through repentance and return to God and His truths... as a Nation.  And that's the difficulty, isn't it?  But difficult things are accomplished with one person's choice to see as God sees.

God loves even those who trespass His laws.  He is ever ready to forgive the sinner and loves them even as they sin.  He does not turn away.

We, as a culture/Nation, have turned away from God.  I was among those.  In so many ways.  And because I know I have turned, I know we, as a Nation, are able to do so as well.  Forgiveness is REAL.  The Atonement our Savior performed is more real than this life with all it's experiences.  We are able to be forgiven and become new in Christ Jesus!

How have we turned away?  We have accepted sin as good.  Homosexuality is not a sin.  Acting on those natural tendencies IS.  Accepting that someone is homosexual does not mean condoning any choice to live out those impulses.  Loving someone who is homosexual does not preclude knowing the sin of acting on that nature.  Yet, our culture/world says it IS good to do wrong.  Even to the point, now, in this Nation, of our Supreme Court ruling against the majority of constituents in the Nation regarding marriage and how it pertains or does not pertain to those who are other than heterosexual.

God ordained marriage in the Garden of Eden when He gave Eve to Adam and commanded them to procreate and replenish the earth.  Man has been defiling the sanctity of marriage in any number of ways and many decreeing that "God said this was good because of ______".  Even prophets, both current and past, are human and make mistakes.  Period.  Accepting and acknowledging that does not reduce all else they did or said to worthlessness.  It just doesn't.  Someone can say something right and righteous and Godly and God inspired in the morning and make a total fool of himself (or herself) in the evening.  The evening's ridiculousness does not negate the morning's  near perfection (or vice versa).  It just makes said person human and  as such, just like the rest of us: perfectly fallible.

I couldn't see it plainly or clearly as my Mom did when she said it those years ago.  But I certainly see the fulfillment speeding upon us.  And the incremental turning up of the heat....

I could trace this descent from much greater righteousness to where were are now.  However, that would be far more work than I'm willing to invest (and thus take away from my family)... If you do it, let me know and I'll share thoughts!  I'd love to see what you come up with.

Because I see the hair issue as a truly integral and HUGE aspect of the cultural acceptance of pedophilia, I'm going to simply expound upon it... in case anyone who doesn't still see the connection is still reading and interested.

Dark hair arriving in special places is one of the indicators of oncoming manhood and/or womanhood.  It heralds a special and important change from childhood to adulthood and all the responsibility inherent therein (perhaps especially the ability and responsibility of parenthood).
Pedophilia rejects adults as desirable... of course.  That's the whole problem with it, right?
So, one of the fundamentally necessary notches on the temp gauge for the frog in the pot that is us is to make hair unwanted....  First among women... because we already accept on some fundamental level that we are sexual objects to the men we desire to love us (how sad, but it is true no matter how we reject it)... so the devil appeals to our desire to remain young and appealing...

I'm sure the first women to go hairless purposefully were in the limelight.  Held up by the media as THE look.  Mass hypnotism was probably implemented at least a little.

But we went willingly and fell into a trap we didn't recognize as such and willingly removed one of the indicators of our maturation, femininity, and womanhood.  We forsook our hair in many places through shaving or other forms of removal.  Just to be clear, I was definitely among those who fell into this trap.

And now the movement is among our men.  Men who are hairy are seen as unkempt... or somehow gross.  Many men (at least among those I used to speak about these things with) WANT to be seen as sexual objects (no wonder they DO it... thinking in terms of the 5 Love Languages....), so of course they want to either shave completely or trim it up so as to be able to be desireable.

Moving the heat up.  Frogs in the pot.

Do you see what I see?

As a result of all this, I will share that I have chosen hair.  Interesting?  I don't know... I don't think so.  Honestly, I think it's the only choice for anyone who truly understands what I've come to know.  I think it's the "right thing to do" for those who desire to honor the gift these bodies are.  Both male and female.

"What?  You mean, let hair grow... down there... with no shaving, trimming, or otherwise?"  And I would return, "Yes.  Anywhere there is hair that grows naturally, let it grow.  Let it grow!  Don't hold it back any more!"  hahaha

Seriously, though.

I admit I still pluck the hairs from my chinny chin chinS... and I don't know that I will stop that any time soon.  I also pluck my eyebrows... a little.  I'm struggling with those hair removal efforts... and the inherent public disappoval inherent it letting THAT go!  *sigh*  I am not free of caring what others' think!  As much as I wish I were truly free....

Lest someone mistake me:

I am now, only better than I was before.  I am merely equal to or less than others in every regard.  Yet, I know God loves me just as He Loves you and everyone else.  I am so late to this change....

I see how this whole hair thing could become a sort of Pharasaical-type issue.  Let it not be so.  If anyone among us choose to grow our hair (anywhere and/or everywhere), let us do it because of our own desire to change.  To grow in self acceptance... because I can tell you, from my own experience, it has opened an awesome flood-gate of self-acceptance!!  And what a huge and awesome gift THAT is!!!

To draw nearer to God is the greatest gift... And I believe that as we accept every part of the gift He has given us in these tabernacles of clay, we grow to know Him more clearly and dearly. 

As a last note, and something I've learned by experience of having hair: there are little things that hair help with... skin sensitivity only one among them.  Maybe you won't keep it forever.  Maybe I won't.  It's good to try new things.

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