Thankful Thursday: Week of July 12 - 18. 2012

On Monday because I forgot on Thursday.  BLAH!  my brain = mush  ;)

I'm thankful for the opportunity to help others.

I'm also thankful for the illness we've encountered in our family.  I have been striving to learn how to give thanks in all things, I've never been truly able to be grateful for illness.  But I do feel grateful this time.  Not because I'm glad my kiddos are sick, really, but because this illness highlights the long-ish run of health we enjoyed.  What a gift to realize how good we had it and will yet have it again!  ^_^

Reverting

I didn't realize, the last time I wrote, that I was out of my poetry month. WOW! I did it and didn't even know it. :) YEAY ME!

Now that Poetry Month is no longer, I'm back to my regular thoughts and sharing. You may prefer not to linger. If not, I'm sorry to lose ya! If you want poems, let me know and I'll try to write some with some regularity. ^_^

Us Lately
So, things are starting to seem all right, regarding my kiddos health. Hopefully.

I was on the computer the last few days, but I didn't feel up to processing my thoughts and feelings into a post. I was, admittedly, very stressed about the illnesses.

Thank you for praying for us, if you did. Ria still as some cough stuff going on, but it is clearing up. Hopefully we'll be able to go to Story Time and Dance on the day appointed for them! ^_^ I'm grateful for God's mercy and willingness to allow me to be the Mama to these wonderful girls (even when I feel they aren't so wonderful, I KNOW they are!).

I administer a number of natural remedies to help us through our illnesses. Have I ever mentioned that? I usually do not use all of them every time. Have your heard of Colloidal Silver? Ester C? Echinacea? Cold Pressed Castor Oil? Breastmilk? (Actually, on that last one... THE perfect natural pharmacopia if ever there was one!!!!!!!! Makes me glad I lactate for so long after each babe!!)

I have a hunger and yearning to "attend" an online school I found a while ago to learn herbs and their uses and become, first a Family Herbalist and then, perhaps more. I'd also like to study some other "alternative health and healing" type stuff, but money is the missing link in all of that hunger and yearning. I do hope that Father will see fit to provide for my studies at some point - as He has in all else - because I would like to do what this lady I recently learned about does. She's a Reflexologist and charges a really minimal fee for visits and wholesale for supplements because she says that Father gave her the gift and she believes she should only require as payment that which is necessary for her basic needs. That's my kind of lady! I actually hope to go see her before too long. I'm super interested in that study, but also interested to see what she'd say about me... and her cost is WAY less than any Doc!! :) Now, that doesn't mean that I believe I have a "gift" for healing or anything. But I think, sometimes, Father bestows desire as our gift. I definitely have THAT.

Anyway, I mention the natural remedies we use because these "things" are, in a big way, sort of crutches for my Faith. I always feel myself like the man (in the Bible) who brought his afflicted son to Jesus and said something like, Please work on my unbelief. *sigh* Perhaps everyone feels this way and I'm just sensitive about my own Spiritual development because I spent a good chunk of time off of the path I know is right. But there IS this one verse in the Book of Mormon that says something about the people using herbs that Heavenly Father had provided for the treatement of fevers. And that makes me feel even more like I want to know herbs and help people use them (as good stewards, of course).

Currently I'm learning more, through an awesome book, about Cold Pressed Castor Oil. We were introduce to this item via our Birth Class Instructor back in VA: Claudia Souther. She's A-MA-ZING! She was actually the lady who introduces Jess and me to some other non-mainstream parenting ideas... and then it was sort of a big ol' snowball that kept on-a-building after that. Anyway. It's an awesome book. I'm looking forward to sharing more as I learn and experiment.

I just realized it's CINCO DE MAYO! ^_^ hehehe

Jessie's Accused and An Emotional Rollercoaster

I forgot to mention the thing that happened with Jess yesterday. He hitched a ride with a couple who live a few blocks away to go clean the church yesterday morning. On the way the three of them talked a bit. It came out, in process of conversation, that Jess wasn't a member of the church. They were both surprised and they discussed that a little bit. Jess even shared with them the "Closer" experiences he's had with a few missionaries. The funniest bit of all of it, for me, was Jessie's description of it. When he first started telling me he had the strangest smile on his face. The kind he usually has when he's going to tell me something I'll think is hilarious. So, before he was even telling me about the conversation I was smiling. But it wasn't a hilarious story, to me. It just makes sense. I mean, like the couple said, Jess just does all the things Members DO! I think, in a way, he might think it's kinda cool that people think he's a member, but that it also amuses him. As he explained it to the couple, he attends church and does all that "stuff" because he wants to be a part of the way he and I have agreed to raise our children. What's not to be thankful in that, right!? So... yesterday Jessie was "accused" of being a member. I chose that word to describe it because it seemed to fit the sort of humor he found in the "accusation." ^_^ I think it's wonderful, for the most part, that people think he is a member!

My Ride on the Rollercoaster
Last night I started having some FIERCE cramping and back pain. It all started on my walk and only the Braxton Hicks subsided after we got home and I was able to sit a bit. The light menstrual cramp-type feeling (that always proceeds active labor for me) became more intense... to the point that I had to quit ChaChaING for the night to lie down, drink lots of water, and hope they went away.

They didn't.

The cramping and pain subsided enough for me to get sleep for most of the night, but it wasn't completely restful and I was trying to drink a bunch to stay hydrated (cause the more water in the system the less cramping a system will experience), so I was, of course, up a lot to use the potty.

Last night Jess TOLD ME that I would be staying home from church in the morning. If you know me, then you know I'm not one to take "being told" very well. I had a plan all figured out for how I was going to get him to let me go to church in the morning because I was certain the cramps would be gone.

They weren't.

I didn't even mention my plan for going to church because my back hurt so bad (like back labor!) that I was anxious to lie down and take it easy and drink lots of water!

Jess left with the girls for church on time (8:30am) so that he could deliver my Primary folders. I tried to lie down and rest. I didn't get to rest at all, really, because I was up every 10 minutes or so to use the potty and it wasn't to get rid of water! I started to feel a little worried after the 4th or 5th trip in such a short period of time (about an hour). This is the sort of thing my body does when in labor! I was so scared. I actually started to think about calling my midwife. If you know me well, which few people know me THIS well, you will know that I do NOT call my midwife for much of anything! I might write her an email, but I RARELY call! Poor Karen has received, now, 2 calls within 2 weeks from me and BOTH on Sundays!!! :p How annoying!

Well, I started to feel jittery a short time later and decided that I did, indeed, need to call my midwife. We spoke briefly and she said she's be over to check me. I felt a bit of relief when we hung up and called Jess to let him know what I was doing. It was right around 9:30am (right in the middle of Sacrament Meeting!). I also asked him to be prepared, should I call again, to speak to Joey and Tim about coming to give me a blessing before he left. I didn't think I would actually call him again.

I was wrong.

At 9:51am I threw up a TON! I was actually violently ill when I was preggie with Kathryn, but as I recall I was not as far along in the pregnancy with her as I am with this one. Also, the illness I experienced way back then did not have all the same signs as the beginning of labor. When I was sick with Kat I was SICK! I had a fever, diarrhea, the works!

As you can probably imagine, I called Jess right away. I was super scared by that point and needed my rock and better half to be right here next to me. He came home REALLY fast. I know HE knows how really unusual it is for me to barf... unless I'm in labor and then it just sort of happens. He was totally solid for me. He kept telling me that he knew it was going to be all right. He doesn't always say that, so when he says it I believe it.

He did speak to Joey before he left church. Shortly after Jess got home, Joey and Tim arrived. They gave me a blessing for wellness and comfort. I did feel comforted and before they left my belly had stopped cramping so much. My back remained (and remains) achy, but I haven't thrown up again. I thought I was going to lose it (anything in my tummy) again right before they pulled up.

Karen arrived a little bit after Joey and Tim departed. She checked me and everything is GOOD... except that the baby is breech. *ah well* Can't win 'em all, right? ^_^ I'm actually not worried about the breech bit at all because this baby rolls and turns SO much more than either of my girls did. I've felt hiccups (usually) in the lower right of my belly, but also in the upper right and left! So, I know this isn't a stationary babe. And it's probably a bit flustered by all the crazy stuff going on around it... cause I KNOW baby felt some of those cramps!

So, whether I was getting ill with some sort of barf bug, or going into labor, the crisis was averted by two faithful Brethren and some Faith! I'm so grateful! Seriously... it was NO walk in the park to barf every hour when preggie (with Kathryn) and I seriously do NOT want to walk that road again! So today will be even more "lazily" than normal a day of REST for Tori! I'm so not wanting to push the whole "what if" button!!!

That's my drama for now. Hope your Sabbath day is more peaceful!

Feeling a Bit Under the Weather

The Weather
I missed my walk today (second day in a row now) because it was raining. I believe this is actually a blessing because Kitty Kat had a fever for most of the day and a bit of diarrhea. She's also told me that her back, foot, and head hurt her at different (and multiple) times during the day. She hasn't felt well. So, it's really a blessing that we actually could NOT go because that meant I got dinner ready and the girls were in bed by about 8:30pm, which is completely unheard of when we leave for the walk at 7pm. We're usually getting home and barely eating at 8:30pm! So, we're literally under the weather (a big storm that took the electricity out for a little while!) and figuratively with Kitty Kat feeling ill.

Reading
Ria read a difficult Finding Nemo book to her Daddy and sister this morning. Kitty Kat spent that time doing three things: looking at her own book, paying attention to what Ria was reading, and practicing praying! I got this second hand, but the way Jess talked about it the whole thing was very cute. Kat does like to begin prayers (sitting or standing reverently). If it lasts longer than a blessing, though, she's off doing something else before long. Obviously she's a toddler.

Ria is just doing amazingly well with her reading. She is getting a little careless with articles, some prepositions, and conjunctions. I think she's just being a little lazy because when it comes to larger words she gets them correct nine times out of ten. She's just rushing a bit too much. We are also working on appropriate pausing. That can be a real humdinger sometimes. She stops at the end of a line rather than the end of a sentence. And then rushes right through the periods. No worries, though, I'm sure she'll catch on and have it figured out before too long. :)

Dissatisfaction
Jess is becoming more and more easily annoyed and aggravated by the seemingly foolish choices made by some people he works for. He's having an increasingly difficult time fitting his knowledge into the "peon" position he's stuck in for various reasons. This is difficult for him, but this is yet another thing to add to the blog post: WHAT HUSBANDS DON'T KNOW. When he is frustrated and upset about his work, I feel frustrated and upset long after he leaves. I just want him to be happy! I know that every job is going to have its ups and downs, but when it feels like there are only downs (from the vented upon perspective that's what it feels like right now), I just want him to get to work on finding other work! So, while he may feel dissatisfied, I feel agitated AND dissatisfied because I am really unable to do anything but listen! Oh, what a difficult position. I would certainly NOT prefer to take over the work role as well as everything else I do and worry about, but sometimes I think it would really be a lot easier if all I really had to worry about was working and spending time with my kiddos when I was home! I know this is simplifying a guy's position a LITTLE bit, but I'm thinking it's not MUCH more complicated than that.

I believe I'm not too terribly far off in the fundamental difference between Jessie's situation (mental and emotioal, but also in reality as well) and mine because of this little joke Jessie LOVES!!! Here it is. Yes, it IS a picture.


Believe it or not, I totally did NOT get it the first time I saw it. I didn't actually see the labels "Man" and "Woman," either, so that's my excuse and I'm stickin to it! Anyway... I just needed to vent somewhere about my state of dissatisfaction with Jessie's work. I would still have some issues with his jobs even if he didn't simply because he's held accountable for far more than he's paid to be, but that's a whole new screen of buttons, knobs, and lights! heehee ;)

Ria Is 4!

Can you believe I have a four year old? It's hard for me to believe it's been so long, yet not. She had a really wonderful birthday, thanks to lots of calls from family and many Happy Birthday wishes. She even heard a few folks sing the birthday song just for her! It was really sweet and she has A BIG smile on her face as she listened.

We are carrying over a tradition my Mom started with her own children. She gave us our choice of dinners for our birthday. Ria chose enchiladas. Now, these are not Mexican-style, they are cajun... and my own personal favorite, by the way. :) She has very good taste, my daughter. They entree takes quite a while to prepare and Jess had to purchase a few of the ingredients FOR the dinner AND cake/icing, plus he still had to work that evening, so yesterday morning was a bit busy to say the least. I was only able to prep a few things, so once he and Ria got home from grocery shopping (their special "date") we were very busy for a few hours. But we were able to enjoy a family lunch for Ria's birthday and it was really lovely! She was so very pleased with everything for her and still smiles SO big when Daddy comments on her new age. She is so very pleased to be 4!

I'm ever so slowly getting things rolling for my newest venture into online selling on ETSY. I'm very excited about it and very hopeful, still. Since being back online, I've been able to reconnect with a friend from Australia and found out that she is a seller on ETSY! What a small world, eh? So funny... and exciting! My seller name is going to be Torimade and I've actually joined under that, so it sort of exits, but I haven't posted anything for sale. Like I said, I'm going very slowly. Ria got me back into working on angels and my other clay creations because she really wanted to make an angel for her birthday. So, we did that for family home evening last night and talked while we worked. Then she wanted to get right back into it this morning first thing. So, as a result, I've got 3 angels made and a baby picture frame almost finished. The picture frame is pretty new for me. The first one I made I gave as a wedding gift to Evelyn Pieper just this last summer. I was pretty please with it, but I don't know if it's a kind of thing others will buy. We shall see, right?

Now, I don't know if I would like to live in a small town that was isolated from others by time and space, but I do have to say that I have learned some nice perks of living in a small town. For instance, our librarian knows us by name and knows our routine for visiting our little library in town. Last week was THE worst for our icky stuff illness and we totally missed both of out library trips (skipped the crochet teaching night and story time). Friday, the day after story time, Ruth called to check on us! Can you believe it? I was so touched. I finally called back today (library is closed Sunday and Monday) and thanked her for the call and let her know we HAD been sick and appologized for having items out late. She told me not to worry about it at all and let me know she had renewed everything because she'd figured something had come up to keep me away. Isn't that the coolest? Well, I thought it was pretty awesome, myself.

We are still fighting the lingering effects of the CRUD we've had. Our sleep schedule is totally out of whack, to boot! UGH. We girls ended up taking a THREE hour nap this afternoon, which is totally unusual under normal circumstances. As a result we woke up right before SEVEN PM! BLAH! *sigh* But, we are slowly improving. The snotties are slowly clearing and maybe diminishing. The girls still wake in the night coughing a bit, but I think it's less often now (maybe... hopefully!).

I'm afraid Jess might be catching the funky junk we've had. He was up coughing a lot last night. If you would, send a prayer that he stays strong and healthy. It's a hard thing being an hourly worker and the sole breadwinner!

We are not happy about a change approaching for Jessie's morning job (The Almond Blossom Cafe). The owner is planning to join her establishment to a gym in The European Village. There are MANY reasons we are unhappy about this change. For one, the new location is quite a distance from us. If Jess were to continue working there, he would have to drive an additional 24 miles each day, plus pay a toll every day to get to his night job, AND not be able to come home between jobs for lunch. Now those are our personal problems with it. There are many other reasons this move is, as we see it, a detriment to the business in general, which Jess cares about because he has a lot of time and effort invested into this thing. The move would mean fewer seats for potential diners and also, because of the venue, the likelihood of selling full-on meals would decrease, so too would revenue. The boss is saying that she's unhappy with the current state of things because she's only breaking even. SHE's ONLY BEEN OPEN EIGHT MONTHS!!!! Most retaurants LOSE money for the first YEAR (if they are lucky they'll break even during year two and then possibly make money year three). And she's unhappy. Ignorant, is really the truth of it. She's never known what to REALLY expect from this industry, which is one thing she said she wanted Jessie for - to inform her about the food industry. But he tries and she totally ignores him! Very annoying!!!! So, those are just a few of the issues. I could continue to rant, but I think I'll leave it alone for now.

Turning a Corner

So, because of our protracted illness, I've missed my first ever La Leche League meeting. "Why?" you might ask, "Were you going to a meeting of that sort when you have successfully nursed one child until she was just older than 2 and are still successfully nursing your youngest, who is almost 17 months old?" Well, let me tell you... It's because of the pressure. You see, most people don't understand "extended breastfeeding". They think nursing is done when the baby is 6 months old. But, I know that nursing has so many benefits that are irreplacable that 6 months is not nearly long enough. And, as a matter of fact, 1 year is not long enough for my nurslings. There are women more dedicated than I who nurse well beyond 2 years, but TWO is my personal goal. Well, I've been questioned a few times about whether Kat was weaned or when I would wean her. I respond that she is not, nor do I feel any need to, but I still feel sort of weak... like I'm going to buckle under the pressure and just go mainstream, which isn't evil and horrible in all respects, but I would lose respect for myself if I did go there in this instance. So, I was hoping to make it to the LLL meeting to speak to other women who REALLY understand BFing and hopefully feel more resolved to continue on my good course. Since we missed, I'm just going to have to count on the two ladies I've spoken to on the phone. They've both said I could call any time, so I'm actually going to take them up on it, even though we've never met. Perhaps we may even become friends!

Ria is much better. She was actually worse off for a good while. Then we used the zapper and my cold pressed castor oil (on her chest) and she's seeming almost back to her self! I'm very happy. You don't know how out of it she was with this illness. Let me see if I can illustrate... she was lying down somewhere for the better part of the last week and a half. If she wasn't lying down, she looked like she should be. Her face was ashen and her eyes were circles of red and droopy lids. She walked unsteadily and whined a LOT more than normal. She was coughing, at the end, so much and so hard that she made herself gag and retch. And she had so much snot coming out of her nose it seemed like her poor little nose was a water faucet turned to leake steadily! So, even though the whining is up from norm, I'm glad to say the other visible symptoms have mostly abated. YEAY!

Kat is worse. She's snotting regularly (though not like a faucet) and her fever is up again. I can't help but think that I have extended this blight because I gave her some motrin for her ear ache last night. And you know, when you do that and it interferes with the fever, the illness is extended most of the time. :p ugh! ahwell, I'm doing my best.

Next week Jess works 6 nights. Not looking forward to that. I feel so much relief after he's been home (even though he might not DO a thing) for a couple nights a week. He was trying to work 6 mornings this week, but thankfully he didn't commit to the 6th day. I think I would have had a temper tantrum of my own if I'd not had some relief from these girls after this LONG week of illness. It's been made so long because we haven't had the regular activities to break up the days at home. Such is life when the babes are ill.

I've finally turned the corner in my mind to be able to spend a good deal of time working on the crochet projects stacked up in my brain! Let's see... there's my friend Tom's little girl, my sisters' THREE to make something-or-others for, and then my regular projects for my own bebe, plus I want to try to get some things made to sell on Etsy! So much to do and less than 8 months to finish it all in. I really BETTER get bookin. Wish me luck!