Day 13

Jessie is almost through the critical first two weeks of becoming a non-smoker. I think it would be an even more critical time period if he wasn't using any nicorette, but he's barely using it. Last time he told me (this weekend) he was down to using only 2 each day. the package suggests 9 for the first 2 weeks. He started at 3 (4 one day) and is down from that! I'm so impressed!!!

So, what do YOU think about all the "food shortage" issues abounding in the news? I, for one, am feeling heightened anxiety about my food storage. The same thing happened (well, not as severly in the news) the last time I was preggie. And, as it happens, the anxiety was a HUGE blessing. I acted on it and purchased a 3 month supply of food. We used almost all of it, living off of food storage almost exclusively, right before and after our move here! So, I feel like this is another blessing. It may not be that the world is going to have a famine in the imminent future, though I DO believe that is a sort of eventuality as a part of these last days, but I really believe that the feeling I'm having is directing me to make some significant additions to our stores (which are NOT up to the 3 month limit we have in FL). We're doing it!!! Even though we might "need" to replace the car, we're going to make sure we have food storage in place before considering that. I'm so grateful Jess understands my feelings, sometimes... like the fact that this anxiety could be a really good indication that we may need what I desperately want to provide for our family, in the very near future!

I don't think I mentioned that my midwife ROCKS! I did mention that we saw her on Friday. After I weighed in, saw the same weight, and she said, "You go girl!" I explicitly spoke to her about my weight. I told her about how I was working to become more fit AND really hoped to lose a certain number of pounds. Her response? "Go for it!" She's completely confident that the baby (or babies??!) are growing well. I measured 19 centimeters and am actually only 17 weeks. (You're supposed to measure the same as your weeks.) So, she's probably going to pressure me about ultrasound if the gap increases as my pregnancy progresses. (At the last appointment I was 12 weeks and measured 13 centimenters.) With Ria I measured 2 cent. higher until really near the end. And with Kat I measure 2 high until I was about 20 weeks. So, it will be interesting to see what happens this time around. :)

On the subject of fitness... I accomplished my goal of walking 5 days for 1 hour each day last week. YEAY!!! I feel really good about that. I also did a really leasurely walk on another day. The girls were both walking, so it was REALLY slow for me.

Another Day In The Sun

We went to Story Time this morning, as per our usual. Kat wasn't having anything to do with the stories. She wanted only to do the craft, which would have been fine except that it would have distracted the other kiddos and we're getting quite a group now! So, she and I sat in the children's area and piddled around.

The playground was our after-Story-Time-stop today. I dared allow the girls to play there because we would be able to stay for quite a while (at least 1/2 hour) before we had to leave to get home and make lunch for Daddy's 1/2 hour break between jobs. The sun was out bright and hot today, but there were some cloudy moments to provide relief while we were at the playground. I've actually got what looks like dandruff because I keep getting sunburns on my scalp! No, seriously! I've inadvertently gotten one at least once a week for the past few weeks. And this week it's two thus far! UGH! Thankfully, my little part-indian children don't have a bit of problem with the sun. They just get a little pink when we're in it and then turn brown. Ok, so they aren't actually BROWN yet, but they are nicely golden. :) You can tell especially on Kat. Her little left-over baby chub rolls make it obvious that she's been in the sun! SO CUTE!

A brother from my Ward called to invite the girls and me to come for breakfast with him and his wife tomorrow. I felt odd about it and bowed-out until a time when Jess could be with us. So, we'll probably have breakfast with them in a few weeks. I was trying to figure out why this invitation made me feel odd because Joseph is a really nice old guy in my Ward and I talk to him every Sunday. I know he likes me very well and I think the main reason for his affection is that he has a daughter named Victoria who is also called Tori AND the same age as me! She's a bit inactive and I think he sort of sees me as a future her. Or how he hopes she may be. (?)

Anyway... I realized that I wasn't okay with the invitation because I really don't enjoy spending time amongst couples (even just one other couple) without MY "other half". And most of the time I really don't have a choice because there are places I'm expected to be and all that whether he's with me or not. But if I can choose I choose NOT to go without him, I will! That made me feel pretty good because there was a while last year during which I didn't care so much and would've rather NOT been around Jessie because of the crud we were going through. So, perhaps I'm healed/healing! YEAY!!! This feels like SUPER good new to me! :)

So, Jess told me this morning that he didn't use ANY of this nicotine losenges yesterday. WOW, right!!!?!! The package of the stuff he has advises 9 per day. Well, I'm just so super impressed with his accomplishment! He was feeling cruddier today than yesterday. Part of the increased cruddy feeling is definitely withdrawl and another (smaller) part is the fact that he used a lozeng today. It was after he told me about using one that I asked how many the package suggests. So, I'm still super impressed with his accomplishment this morning because he's so WAY under the suggested use! :) Anyway, I sent him for a 10 minute nap after lunch. Those minutes are when we get to sort of talk and the girls get to cuddle up to him. So, that bit of lying down at home was really rough on me because the girls NEED their Daddy... but I'm trying my best to help and not complain to him... so I need to do a little somewhere. Sorry if it's annoying.

When Jess got home I had cold grapefruit juice ready for him. In his experience drinking some of that down quickly can be energizing, which is WHY I had it ready, of course. He didn't want any of the other things I read about on http://www.cancer.org/. He actually asked me to read the section on that site about what others can do to help their quitter. ahwell I'm just going with what he says he needs and have to trust that he can manage his lifestyle change.

I have more pictures to get up, but I have already put a few more up today. The link is two posts down. I don't actually know it by heart otherwise I'd put it in here.

THANK YOU!!! to those who have left comments!!! I LOVE THEM!!!! AND, a special THANK YOU to Heidi for the sweet email to share her thoughts on my pictures of the work I've been busy with lately. I LOVE the feedback and suggestions!!!!

Today is Jessie's Quit Date

When he told me the news yesterday my heart flip-flopped and all I could think to ask was, "Which job??!!" I felt so anxious! Before I could ask, though, he was continuing on to tell me that his Councilor has advised that he tell as many people as possible to make it more public so that if he didn't stick with it he would be disappointing more than himself. I felt relief to such a degree that I started to nervously laugh and explain what I'd thought he meant. I'm not the only one either because I told my friend Carrie what he'd said and SHE totally asked me which job he was quitting! :)

So, Jess came home for lunch and was far more exhausted that normal. He felt that it was the only withdrawl symptom he'd suffered thus far. He was very pleased that he hadn't felt the need to use any Nicorete yet. I think that it IS a possibility, but it's equally as likely and possible, in my opinion and experience with him, that it's his natural tendency to sort of sleep through difficult things, so he's feeling the urge to do that. In reality it's probably a little of both.

Do you wonder how this came about? Well, obviously I can only tell you what I know from my point-of-view. A little while back we were seriously talking about a rather big change. A few days after we started talking about it he told me, very seriously, that he thought he should stop smoking to better be able to manage the change. Well, I sort of got aggitated and told him I just didn't care. I told him I didn't want to hear about it and if he felt like doing it - GOOD, but leave me out of it. So, I didn't hear anything more about the subject and that was just fine.

Then we received this package in the mail. It was a large envelope and for whatever reason I didn't open it even though I normally open all the mail. The next day I noticed the envelope open and a book and some papers from The American Cancer Society laying on the table. I was sort of weirded out by that because I thought he received it randomly. After another few days I asked him what that stuff was all about. It was then that I learned the a bit of the story.

Jess had decided to go ahead and quit smoking. He heard a commercial on the radio for a program that would help smokers quit so he called it and got some info. That's all he said.

I missed a package because I was busy with something I couldn't get to the door for a UPS delivery. I got the little sticky paper that they leave and didn't really read it, but thought it was for a package I was expecting. Jess saw it later and asked about it. I was like, "Why are you so interested?" He said it was because the package was for him. I argued until I read the paper and then appologized. I was sort of concerned and asked him what he was expecting in the mail (because we hadn't talked about a purchase). It was then that I learned "The Rest of The Story" as it were. With the information he received there is also a Program. In the program he gets eight weeks of Nicorette in whatever form he requests and advising sessions with someone for the duration of the program; all for FREE!!! So then I REALLY appologized. I was also SUPER impressed to learn all this and even the tiniest bit excited.

So, that pretty much brings us to today. He drove the van to work, which I think is a real blessing because the drive to and from The Club was the time he expected to be the most difficult. It's annoying that I'm going to have to limit my traveling to the morning until we can figure out the problem and fix whatever is wrong with the car. But, if it helps Jess quit, I'm totally all for it! I don't mind a little inconvenience!!!! ((^_^))

I have TONS of pictures to upload, but I'm not sure I'll be able to do anything with them. However, I'm going to share with yall my Flickr information anyway because that's where my newest "work" related pictures will be. http://www.flickr.com/photos/24548515@N08/ The last time I tried uploading there it froze up and I had to shut my computer down (just like here).

Perhaps we'll have this figured out soon and my blog will once again have pretty things to look at and not just lots and lots of words! ;)