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I Am... Mama and Writer

First Mama.  Then Writer.  Though, of late, the latter has consumed a great deal of time as I work to get things in order to potentially be ...

Showing posts with label change. Show all posts
Showing posts with label change. Show all posts

Thursday, September 20, 2012

A Cold Day (Talking About My Personal Seasons)

Have you ever watched a movie and felt like you saw yourself in a... a not so pleasant light?  Perhaps an aspect of one of the Essene Mirrors... or maybe just watching your biggest sort of anxieties about yourself appear before your very eyes on the "big screen"?

Well, unfortunately, I've had this experience recently.  I'm sure, by the time this publishes (since I'm post-dating because I really don't want to tell you about this while it's as raw as it is!), I won't feel nearly so poorly about myself regarding what I've just seen... but right now... WOW.

Have you seen the movie "Jack and Jill"?  It's good.  Only PG, which is rare anymore, right?  And a comedy.  And it was funny.  To me it was funny.  I enjoyed it.  There were a couple points during the movie that I laughed and then felt totally... uncomfy... like I'd just looked in the mirror and realized exactly how fat I really am after having a totally different picture of my appearance in my own mind.  *sigh*

But it didn't really hit me until the movie was completely over.  And here I am realizing how completely JILL I am... the huge drawback of my reality: I don't have a twin brother who is cool.  Also, I would be hard pressed to allow you to believe I'm as big-hearted as Jill....  So, I'm just "Jill" with none of the "Jack" coolness or HUGE positives to even me out.  Also, I have never been pursued by Al Pacino... actually... I haven't really been pursued, per se.  Yeah... wack, I know.

I've realized this truth (the Jill-ness of me) about myself many times before in various ways.  And in the moments after realizing a new degree of truthfulness and depth of my Jill-ness... well, it is really upsetting and hurts quite a lot.  But I manage... I handle it and then I own it.  Because that's just who I am.

"Okay," I say to myself (or something like this), "I'm significantly less feminine than I wish I was.  Okay.  Now, where do I go from here.  Well, I'm not willing to feel like a hoochie and wear all kinds of make-up," (and I promise you it would take a ton of that chemical glop to make a difference ova-hee-ahh)... "So, I simply must accept who I am... growing mole on my chin and all and get over it.!  No, you do not have to look at it in the mirror!  You don't have to try to figure out if it's grown any more recently.  Pull the hairs off your chinny-chin-chin (and neck) and get the heck outta there!"  Yes, folks... I did just go there.

Obviously, in the moments of writing this post I'm not feeling as "up" as I would prefer.  But FOR CRYIN' OUT LOUD... life is a series of SEASONS people.  Maybe I'm being too real about my personal experience of a period of down time... but this too shall pass.  Both the good and the "bad" always do.  We can count on that... it'll pass no matter how much we want OR DON'T WANT it to.

So, pray me some pleasant stuff, if you think of it and want to.  I sure do know prayer works!  And I'll keep working on using the tools for changing my brain (scripture, prayer and meditation are those to which I am referring) to get myself UP and able to have a higher frequency overall... so that even when the down season comes, it'll be higher than what it is currently.  I KNOW know KNOW this is possible (the raising of frequency/vibration, overall) and really can and does happen as I've already experienced it in HUGE ways.  Although I recognize the down-ness of now, I am also able to compare it to down seasons in the past.  And let me tell you... this is NOTHING!  Praise God for working changes in me!!!  I'm so very grateful!!!  (And so it begins: the upturn.  Give thanks in ALL things, my friend!)  ^_^

(Actually wrote this after "date night" of watching Jack and Jill with Jessie: August 19, 2012.)
 
 September 20, 2012
Just as I expected, the season has turned, and again, and again... currently, I feel significantly better than I did when I wrote this.  Lately, though, my experience has been similar to climate change: changeable.  But this is just part of the healing process after the miscarriage, I believe.  Anyway, that's all we can count on in this life (of mortal, unGodly things, I mean): change.

Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Disturging News... it is now a little old, but still valuable

Are you aware of what is happening in legislation in the USA?  Do you know the freedoms we have waived by not knowing they were being taken?  Do you realize the impact and import of all that is happening?  Do you see Revelations coming to life as I do?

This http://www.naturalnews.com/035301_Obama_executive_orders_food_supply.html article is now old news, but I'm gunna bet you don't know the depth and bredth of the problems referenced within it.  DO tell me if I'm mistaken and you already know all these bits... especially the ones toward the bottom of the article that reference more than "just" one form of rights being seized.

It's just plain ole disturbing.

What do we do?

Text of the original article found at the above link:


Obama seizes control over all food, farms, livestock, farm equipment, fertilizer and food production across America

Learn more: http://www.naturalnews.com/035301_Obama_executive_orders_food_supply.html#ixzz23wGh62bu

"We told ya so" just doesn't quite cut it anymore. As the American sheeple slept, selfishly refusing to take a stand against tyranny, the Obama administration has been plotting what can only be called a total government takeover of America.

On March 16, 2012, President Obama issued an executive order entitled, "NATIONAL DEFENSE RESOURCES PREPAREDNESS." http://www.whitehouse.gov/the-press-office/2012/03/16/executive-order-national-defense-resources-preparedness

This executive order states that the President alone has the authority to take over all resources in the nation (labor, food, industry, etc.) as long as it is done "to promote the national defense" -- a phrase so vague that it could mean practically anything.

The power to seize control and take over these resources is delegated to the following government authorities:

(1) the Secretary of Agriculture with respect to food resources, food resource facilities, livestock resources, veterinary resources, plant health resources, and the domestic distribution of farm equipment and commercial fertilizer;

(2) the Secretary of Energy with respect to all forms of energy;

(3) the Secretary of Health and Human Services with respect to health resources;

(4) the Secretary of Transportation with respect to all forms of civil transportation;

(5) the Secretary of Defense with respect to water resources; and

(6) the Secretary of Commerce with respect to all other materials, services, and facilities, including construction materials.


This takeover is designed, in part, to "stockpile supplies" for the U.S. military. Authority for this total takeover of all national resources is granted with nothing more than the writing of a single statement that claims these actions are necessary to "promote the national defense." As stated in the order:

the authority delegated by section 201 of this order may be used only to support programs that have been determined in writing as necessary or appropriate to promote the national defense:

(a) by the Secretary of Defense with respect to military production and construction, military assistance to foreign nations, military use of civil transportation, stockpiles managed by the Department of Defense, space, and directly related activities;


What all this means is that the U.S. government now claims the power to simply march onto your farm with guns drawn and demand all your crops, seeds, livestock and farm equipment.

Think I'm exaggerating? Read it yourself!

And for those living in denial who refuse to accept the reality of what's happening in America, remember the following:

• When NaturalNews reported on the existence of the NDAA, we were told our reporting was misleading because Obama opposed it and wouldn't sign it.

• When Obama betrayed America and signed the bill, we were told our reporting was misleading because "it didn't apply to Americans."

• When Obama admitted it did apply to Americans, he announced that he would choose "not to use it on Americans" but only by the grace of his restraint. Nobody who previously accused us of misleading the public had the integrity to offer us an apology and say, "Gee, you were right, it DOES apply to Americans!"

• Now Obama has seized control over all food, farms, livestock, water and transportation across America. How many brain-dead Americans will continue to live in denial and try to convince themselves this is not happening? Sticking your head in the sand does not make this go away...

What California did to Rawesome Foods, the Obama administration can do to everyone

Remember the armed raids on Rawesome Foods? With guns drawn, California authorities assaulted the food distribution center, arrested the farmers, then proceeded to destroy $50,000 worth of food including milk, eggs, cheese and watermelons. (http://www.naturalnews.com/033220_Rawesome_Foods_armed_raids.html)

As outrageous as that raid was, it's only the beginning. Now, thanks to Obama's executive order, the federal government can conduct Rawesome-style raids on all farms, all grocery stores, all food co-ops and even individual home gardens.

It's written in plain English. This is no longer debatable and it's not a conspiracy theory. It's Obama administration policy. For what other purpose would this be issued in an executive order if it was not seen as actionable by the government? This piece of paper, you see, gives them the (false) authority to do whatever they want and then have the front-line soldiers who carry it out claim "we're only following orders."

Sound familiar? Heil Hitler!

Understanding the fraud

This executive order starts out by stating that the U.S. President is the "Commander in Chief" of the U.S. military. This is false. He is not the commander in chief unless and until Congress declares an Act of War. No acts of war have been declared in recent memory, and certainly not under Obama who doesn't even seek congressional approval for war.

So Obama is in no way a "Commander in Chief." In fact, it is questionable whether he is even a U.S. citizen.

The phrase "national defense" can be twisted to mean almost anything. It could be invoked from something as harmless as a barge sinking in the harbor. It could even be invoked based on fabricated intelligence such as a fake website post from someone alleged to be "Bin Laden's second in command" who appears to shout some sort of threat against the United States of America. So the claim that this seizing of national resources will only be done under some sort of national defense emergency is pure bunk -- both Obama and Bush before him have already declared we are living under a national defense emergency! Thus, the conditions described in this executive order have already been triggered. It is already in effect!

Notice how nothing in this document talks about protecting the People? Serving the People? Supporting the People? It's all about protecting the government! The government needs stockpiles of weapons, food and resources -- but YOU don't! Such is the philosophy of current government which sees itself as all powerful and the People as helpless, mindless slaves of the state.

Tyrannical governments concern themselves with important concepts such as continuity of government but never the continuity of liberty for the People. At the first drop of a hat, liberty gets thrown out the window to keep government in power.

Other signs of the takeover

• Last year, I interviewed Farmer Brad in central Texas, who openly stated, on camera, that FEMA has already started calling farms across Texas and demanding an inventory list of all their crops and seeds. Watch this interview yourself at: http://tv.naturalnews.com/v.asp?v=72620642EB2DE54931674ED4857C08EC

• Yesterday in Chicago, the police arrested NBC reporters outside a hospital, screaming that their First Amendment rights could be taken away from them at any time:
http://www.prisonplanet.com/cop-arrests-nbc-reporters-says-your-first...

• Secretary of Defense Leon Panetta recently revealed in U.S. Senate testimony that the Obama administration takes its orders from the UN and that the U.S. Congress is now null and void. (http://wethepeoplefree.com/constitution/senator-sessions-leon-panetta...) and (http://www.infowars.com/coup-detat-pentagon-obama-declare-congress-ce...)

• When MF Global head Jon Corzine stole billions of dollars from investors (many were farmers), there were absolutely no investigations, no indictments and no criminal arrests! Massive financial theft is now openly tolerated in America as long as those doing the stealing are politically connected to the Obama administration. (http://www.prisonplanet.com/the-cojones-defense-of-jon-corzine.html)

Of course, it's not an Obama thing. Bush was much the same. It's not the name of the person in the Oval Office who matters, it's the fundamental lack of principles and ethics reflected across government today. Instead of protecting the rights of the People, today's corrupt governments are little more than criminal gangs who steal power and resources for themselves (and their connected buddies) while destroying the economy and stealing everything in sight from the real workers upon whose sweat-drenched backs America was built.

Learn more: http://www.naturalnews.com/035301_Obama_executive_orders_food_supply.html#ixzz23wGVobq5

Friday, July 27, 2012

Seven Essene Mirrors

The Seven Essene Mirrors explained by Gregg Braden.  I've almost transcribed the YouTube at the bottom.  I often find it easier to read than watch things.  If you're interested in watching it, it is embedded below.

Each moment of our life, the reality of our internal truth (what we have become) is mirrored to us by the actions, the choices, and the language of those around us.

The First and Second Essene Mirrors of Relationships

First mirror: shows my presence in the moment... what we reflect by others in the moment.  What we are radiating in the moment.

Second mirror, similar quality, but more subtle: mirrors to us that which we judge in the moment.

When I find that many people show me the same pattern of anger or fear... they may be showing me my internal truth in the moment.

Multiple new relationships appear within the same month: PAY ATTENTION.  There is something to learn.

Look at the people you hold most dear.  Look at the qualities that push your buttons most.  Are they showing you what you are in the moment?  Or are they showing you what you judge in the moment?

Understanding the Inner Technology of Emotion
The Third and Fourth Essene Mirrors

Third Essene mystery/mirror of relationship: the mirror we sense every time we find ourselves in the presence of a person who, when we look in their eyes you feel an electrical charge.

Through the course of our lives we give away or lose parts of ourselves.  When we find ourselves in the presence of another inidividual who embodies what we have lost, we will feel it as a magnetic connection to that person.  Ask: what is it I see in this person what I have lost or I've given away or was taken from me?

We will seek to reinforce that which we have lost, given away or had taken away.

Fourth Essene mystery/mirror of relationship: Has a little bit of a different quality.  Through the course of our lives often we will adopt patterns of behavior that become so important to us that we will rearrange the rest of our lives to accomodate this pattern or behavior.  When we find ourselves in this situation, we find that these patterns may be compulsive or addictive patterns of behavior.  The fourth mystery allows us to see ourselves in the presence of addiction or compulsion.  Through addiction and compulsion, we give away little by little the things that are most important to us.  And in the giving away, we have the opportunity to see ourselves as we lose the things we hold most dear.

Alcohol or nicotine may come to mind.  Issues of control.  Addiciton to sex.  Need for money/create money/abundance - all addiction/compulsion behaviors.

The pattern unfolds gradually unfolds over time.  We give away what is most important to us over time.  We may recognize the pattern at any time and heal, at any time.  Rather than taking it to its extreme.  And find our wholeness in the healing.

The Fifth Essene Mirror:  Perhaps single most powerful pattern.  Can see more and to a greater level why we've lived the lives we live.  It is the mirror that our parents showed to us through the course of our childhood/lives with them.  Through this mirror we are asked to allow for the possibility, to entertain the possibility that perhaps the actions of our parents toward us are mirroring our beliefs and expectations of what may be the most sacred relationship we'll ever know in our lifetime: relationship between us and our Heavenly Mother and Father.  It is through this relationship with our earthly parents that our parents are showing us ourselves in that expectation and beliefs of that divine relationship.  For example: if we find ourselves in a relationship with our parents where we feel judged, constantly.  Or that we feel that our best is never good enough.  There is a high probability that what is being mirrored is our belief within ourselves that we may not be good enough.  Or that we may not have accomplished that which may have been expected of us.

Through our perceptions of ourselves and our creator.  It’s a powerful and subtle mirror.  And it may tell us more about why we’ve lived our lives as we have than any other.

There are few absolutes.  There are often exceptions.  If you feel something inside of you welling up that says NO WAY, you’ve likely encountered something that could be really powerful.  The only way you’ll have a response is when you are being shown something that is so deep you may have chosen to avert looking at it in the past.

There is a good possibility that the words (positive and negative) you have used to describe your parents have very little to with those you call Mom and Dad.  With those words, you are describing a mirror.  This is the mirror your parents have held to you of the most sacred relationship you will experience.  The way you see your Mother and Father (the words you use) of this world is a mirror of your expectations of the relationship you have with your Heavenly Mother and Father.  There are many ways to look at this.  Is it possible that inviting you to this world lives an unspoken responsibility that those who raise us are surrogates, they are the closest thing we know in our Heavenly Creator.  They have impeccably held to you the way you see your relationship with your Heavenly Parents.

When you perceived your parents anger, you felt what your creator felt.

This mirror may show you your beliefs, your expectations of what your creator feels for and about you.

Sentence: What would you say to your parents if you had only one minute left?  What would you like to hear from your parents in the last minute of your life?

Through our earth life, we have the opportunity to heal our relationships with both earthly parents and Heavenly Parents by recognizing what the mirror is trying to show us, so to release it.

Both the positive and negative attributes of our earthly parents mirror to us of how we perceive our Heavenly Parents.

The Sixth Essene Mirror: ominous name: dark night of the soul

We are reminded that life has a propensity toward balance, nature has propensity toward balance.  It takes an extremely skillful and masterful being to upset the balance in nature and to upset the balance in our lives.  When we find ourselves in the greatest challenges of life, it in those moments that we may be assured that the only way those challenges are possible is after we have amassed each tool that will allow us to move through that challenge with grace and with ease… until those tools are amassed, we will never see ourselves in the situations that ask us to demonstrate these high levels of mastery.

From this perspective, the greatest challenges of life, may be viewed as tremendous opportunities to demonstrate mastery, rather than tests that may be passed or failed in life.  It is through this mirror that we see ourselves naked, without the emotion and feeling and thought and constructs around us that we have constructed around us to keep us safe.  We have the opportunity to see ourselves in a naked way and to prove to ourselves that the process of life may be trusted.

This mirror is an opportunity to lose everything we’ve held dear in life and see ourselves naked.  As we climb out of the abyss that is left after the loss of everything we held dear, and we see ourselves in a new way; this is where we find our highest levels of master.

LIGHT and DARK

From the ancient perspectives, possibility that the forces at play in our polarized world have chosen to come here to anchor.  The only way to anchor, is for a force or field to hold the mirrors for us.  Pre-twelfth century texts show benign beings Gabriel and Lucifer volunteering to anchor light and dark respectively.

Dream fire ceremony: gaze into the flame, at the space between the flame and the rest of the flame… it allows us to relax and move into an altered state of awareness, sometimes without knowing it.

Your body mirrors your belief.  Illness is only possible if you believe that the forces of light and dark are separate.  If we know that dark and light both originate in our creator, we will not fear.

As you heal each memory (a single memory) you heal the universal fears (3).

  1. Fear of not being good enough.
  2. Fear of trusting and surrendering.
  3. Fear of abandonment and separation.
The science of compassion is an even great possibility.

The Seventh Essene Mirror: Most subtle.  It asks us to allow for the possibility, that each experience of life, regardless of its outcome, is perfect in its nature.  Regardless of whether or not we achieve the lofty goals that have been set by others, we are invited to view our accomplishments in life without comparing them to anything else, without any external reference.  The only way we can view ourselves in failure or success is when we measure our accomplishments to an external yardstick.  The question then arises, what is it that we hold ourselves accountable to?  What do we use as our yardstick of accomplishment?    From the perspective of this mirror, we are asked to allow for the possibility that all aspects of our lives (each aspect of our personal life: body shape, body weight, academic, business, athletic achievements) are perfect as they stand.  And can only be judged when they are compared to an external reference.

Allow for perfection in the imperfections of life.  What standard are we holding ourselves to which cause us to feel unhappy?

How do I know when I have succeeded or failed at something in life?

My Notes For Me
If I am giving you the best that I can, until I compare myself to someone else, I am ‘perfect.’  (Perfect in that 100% is 100%, not perfect as is Christ.)

Power of thought, feeling and emotion will make us more than Christ (as He predicted).

Essene’s remind us that we will go through each of these mirrors through this life.  Sometimes multiple times and sometimes multiple mirrors at a time.

We are invited to know ourselves in the presence of others through our relationships.  As those relationships are reconciled, we become the benefit of that healing.  It is that benefit that we carry with us through life as we walk between the worlds of heaven and earth.
Compassion

Jesus Christ and how He chose to respond to a woman with whom he worked.

Two questions Jesus asked before He healed as conveyed in the Bible: Do you believe in me?  Do you believe in my Father?  Response: yes or no.  Then: What have you learned in your illness?

Woman born with leprosy.  She was angry at her disease.  She responded that she had learned nothing.  She said she was so hideous she’d never had a friend, never known a man, all cower from me.  Christ responded, “If you have learned nothing, then die and come to know yourself through death.”  He loved her that much.

Compassion may be defined as:

Thought without attachment to the outcome.
Feeling without distortion.
Emotion without charge.

Anger is in polarity.  Denial, not allowing feeling.  Allow feeling opens path to compassion.  If you feel nothing when you learn of something horrible, it’s possible that you are in denial.  If you want to get even or make someone pay, you are allowing yourself to feel.  If you can say to yourself, I miss those people and this didn’t have to happen and there’s a sense that there is a balance in the event, then you may be on the way to compassion.

Our Father’s Prayer: Aramaic: Our Father who is everywhere.












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